Burning, Ice Dragons, and Jam Bands

Today in church, everyone was going around doing the standard, "Prayers and Praises of the People," and one guy stood up and told this little ditty. "I woke up this morning and went outside to let the pooches out and I realized that there was no wind, mild weather, and no rain.  Then I looked over at the giant pile of brush and lumber my wife and I had been saving for the last year.  I went in and called to my wife, 'Well, we can either burn today or go to church.'  We obviously decided to come here instead of burn."  I'm not in Washington anymore, am I?

So, the fam and I (my only friends until today) went to Cripple Creek yesterday for the ice sculpture festival.  Cripple Creek is an old mining town turned ghetto casino-ville.  It's blocks are filled with casinos and really old people.  It was fun to see the sculptures folks were carving with chain-saws.  We gambled a little and---did you know, if you gamble (even the penny slots) you can have all you can drink booze?--I had plenty of strawberry daiquiris.  We didn't win any jack-pots but we sure did have fun except for the creepers who stand in the gutters of the street smoking and looking around all wooly gooly.  It's a rough crowd up in Cripple Creek.  It's like all the people who go to Wal-Mart in Canon at 11 pm at night.  Of course, I would have to be like those people because that would mean I have been to Wal-Mart at 11 pm.  

In other news, I made a girl-friend today at church who is younger than I am but in my age range.  We're going to get together and do something.  Also, I was asked to join a jam-band at my church with my banjo!  I'm not good but they don't seem to care.  Look-out bluegrass land, here comes Christy Fisher and her banjo Millie!

Jesus was the Matt Damon of his time?

I had the middle school kids I work with fill out a short survey for me at our last youth group to find out what they know about the bible, Jesus, faith, etc and why they go to church or don't go to church.  One of my favorite answers to my question, "Who is Jesus?" was, "He was the Matt Damon of his time."  Was the kid mocking my question?  Probably, but who cares.  I'm lucky I got the group to fill out the questionaires to begin with.  I don't know that I have ever experienced such a rowdy crowd.  I have worked with some really 'urban' kids but these rurban (my new word for a place that is both urban and rural, a word fusion you could say) kids are something else.  I had the kids introduce themselves to me again and tell me one important thing for me to know about them.  One tiny girl (6th grade) replied, "Lady, I got a short fuse.  You mess with this, you'll get an explosion you won't want to reckon with."  

So, there you go.  I feel like this is the christian version of "Adventures in Baby-sitting."  So, we'll see how it goes.

My dad and I went ATV/4-wheeling on Friday to a place called Oil-Well Flats.  It's right across the street from another area called Dinosaur Flats.  One place apparently produced oil and the other, dinosaur bones.  Oooo, yay!  I have included pictures of that affair.  My parents purchased a 2 person ATV and helmets with skulls and flames to boot.  It's pretty fun and I have to laugh.  I feel like I'm living a strange existence these days.  

Cactus Butt!

I have been in Canon City for 9 days now.  That is nearly two weeks.  You all may be very interested in what I do with my time.  Well, I have our first official middle school youth group this evening.  There is something like 15 boys and 3 girls.  I'm not going to lie, I get middle school girls but middle school boys are like aliens from Mars.  I'm going to make my group fill out an evaluation about who they think Jesus is and why they don't come to church.  Although, I'm not sure why I'm going to bother asking that latter question.  I went to church last Sunday and as far as I could tell, I was sitting with a bunch of dinosaurs.  

This youth group should be interesting.  We ACTUALLY have diversity.  There are a couple black kids and a couple of latinos.  The latest news on the street is that the high school and middle school allow kids to call the black kids niggers.  Great.  Welcome to the capital of the KKK in Colorado.  Oh, did I forget to mention that?  Not only did the Grand Dragon of the KKK live in Canon, we have the most prisons per capita than most cities in the U.S.  Neat, huh?  In fact, the minimum security prison was built right into the ridge of mountains as you enter out town.  We have a little thing called, "Skyline Drive," -- a drive that goes on the skyline so you can see the city and what lies behind.  If you time it right in the summer, you can either drive or walk up to the top and watch the inmates playing baseball.  Or watch the people who park on the top make-out.  Sweet, huh?  Another bonus are the Stegosaurus foot prints on the way to the top.  Ooooo and don't forget the Hogbacks on the other side.  Golly, don't you all want to come visit me.

Today, Cooper and I took a five minute drive to one of my favorite places in the world -- Red Canyon Park.  You may be wondering, where is the snow?  Well, I happen to live on the banana belt of Colorado.  No, we don't grow bananas but we get both snow and 70 degree weather in the winter.  It's a good balance for folks who get tired of one season.  Cooper had his first run-in with a cactus and I had a reunion with one.  In middle school my nick-name was Cactus Butt because on a field trip I fell down the side of a hill and got cactus in my rear.  The nurse had to remove it for me because it was so aggressively in my behind.  

Well, that's all for now.  I miss you all tons.  My only companion is still Cooper.  I mean, I thought about befriending the Cherry Peddler Guy but he's just too creepy.